Lolita's Least Likely Protector

“I adore her horribly. No: ‘horribly’ is the wrong word. I qualify it as pathetic. Pathetic – because despite the insatiable fire of my venereal appetite, I intended, with the most fervent force and foresight, to protect the purity of that twelve-year-old child.” (pg. 62-63) 

     After describing his very first sexual experience with Lolita, Humbert reveals a depth in his feelings for her that goes much deeper than a mere physical desire or attraction. Despite the overwhelming sense of pleasure and accomplishment that he gains from this encounter with Lolita, Humbert resists the overwhelming urge to repeat the event because he wants to preserve his perfect nymphet’s innocence. In fact, his satisfaction comes primarily from the fact that Lolita appeared not to notice anything or realize something out of the ordinary had even happened. This demonstrates that Humbert, himself, feels slightly uncomfortable with the prospect of a young girl behaving erotically or sexually, especially his nymphet, Lolita. This demonstrates even further that Humbert’s desire for Lolita surpasses that of merely shallow, carnal gratification. This obviously does not justify Humbert’s behavior with the young girl, but it does put a big dent in the argument that this novel is purely pornographic (as some have called it and thus subsequently banned it). 

     If Humbert’s relationship with Lolita was purely based on a need for physical fulfillment, then he would have no reason to care for her “purity,” “safety,” and emotional state as he does continually, even immediately after his first sexual experience with her. Humbert describes his adoration for Lolita first as “horrible” then as “pathetic,” two words that shed a negative light not the subject of his affections, but on his affections, themselves. The fact that Humbert, even in his own defense of his actions, chooses not to glorify his feelings and behavior but instead feels more inclined to hide them, reveals a slight sense of regret.

     Humbert’s inner struggle between his physical desires and care for Lolita’s innocence forces the reader to decide if Humbert is simply a pedophile or an ill-fated lover.